Sunday, February 28, 2010

"He got up, rebuked the wind, and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm." - Mark 4:39

When I heard about the earthquake in Chile, I was moved and found myself thinking, "Lord, what is going on?" And when I heard about the ensuing tsunami I was stirred toward acting in a state of prayer. Perhaps it hit home more than the earthquake because I myself had a season in my life when Hawaii was my home and because there were still connections in Hawaii. Mark 4:39 came to my mind as I started to pray. Knowing that the speaker of those words and the author of the winds could calm the storm, I asked God to calm the seas and bring peace to the shores. Even in a prayer so bold one can be challenged to think, "As I pray this, do I really believe that it can happen?" In my state of prayer I was challenged with that thought. Too often, I feel like I don't have the faith to back my prayers. But God is drawing me to a state of belief. He is all and can do all. I believe that it is the prayers of many all over the world that calmed the sea. It challenges me to continue asking big things. God is in control over all. We ask and He brings the storm to a stillness. A devastating situation could have been even more devastating. But, God poured His peace over the water and the oceans were brought to a calm.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

A little attempt at being real

I just feel like writing. I don't even know if anyone reads my blog anymore, so I guess that gives me even more of a feeling to be real. Sometimes, I feel like I am not real often enough.

So, I was thinking the other day about the whole Facebook thing. When I open my Facebook page, the first thing that I see is the question of what is on my mind. Yet, so often I feel like I can't share what is really on my mind. Can I say that I am sad and feel forgotten? Can I share that I am scared about what is in the future and if I am really going to be able to accomplish what is ahead? Can I admit to the fact that sometimes I don't feel like I have what it takes to do what I feel God is calling me to? Can I really share what is on my mind? Can I confess that I had a bad week? Most the time, I feel like the answer to that question is, "No." I feel like if I really share with the world what is going on then I will be perceived as a downer. I know that I always have joy at my disposal, but that does not mean that I am always happy and quite honestly I need to be able to share when I am not happy. In the last year I feel like there was a time when I actually did let my guard down and I let my smile fall from my face. It came back to bite me in the butt. I know that for the most part I am a happy positive person, but folks I have my days too. Though I might be smiling on the outside, it does not always reflect what is within. I can definitely grin and bear it, but can I please also have a place where I can be real? I would really like to be able to be authentic. I know that I am to blame for putting some of the pressure on myself and that is an area that I can grow in. But sometimes the circumstances around us don't help and I have definitely had some circumstances that have not been helpful. But I guess that is what makes us stronger in the end. As we push through we come out with more strength to battle the odds. (Does that even make sense?)

So there you have it. That is my attempt at being real. I don't even know if anyone will see this, so perhaps I still remain hidden in my own struggles. I know this season will pass. I know that I will pull through and in the end will be stronger and that is the thought that I leave with to get me through. I really am ok. Yes, I am perhaps dealing with sadness, but I know that it's all going to be ok.

Sunday, February 7, 2010


My own personal report on the crazy weather in the Washington DC area.


video

Friday, February 5, 2010

Here comes the snow...but I say it's alright

Well, at least I would like to think that it's alright. Let's see if I say the same thing when I wake up in the morning tomorrow. Right now, as I write this it has probably snowed about 5 inches (at least that is from what I could tell about 45 minutes ago). That is enough in itself, but there is more...the snow is not supposed to end until 8 pm tomorrow night (according to weather.com) and evidently the "blizzard" has not even hit yet. Oh goodness. Well, I will be staying in tomorrow. At least until I get up the gumption to go out and shovel. And the whole shoveling thing is somewhat dependent on the ankle that I am pretty sure that I sprained the other day. I am really not trying to complain, just being real. I have to say that I really am looking forward to having an excuse to stay all cozy inside, drinking hot beverages and reading some Jane Austin. I know that I will wake up tomorrow and probably not recognize the sight outside, but am anticipating that it will be breathtaking. I have definitely done my share of complaining in this winter season and have come to the conclusion that I am a warmer weather gal. But each season is special and serves its own purpose. Many people like snow. I am not one of them, but who am I to rain on anyone else's parade. So, tomorrow I will look outside and gaze on the beautiful winter wonderland. I will then drink a warm cup of coffee and maybe, just maybe, I will find myself venturing outside to play.
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